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Tonight I went out with kat. I had an awesome time... I really did. There was all sorts of crazy drama going on, and other good times to be had. I did not spend almost any time at all with kat though. She passed out at midnight in annapolis. It's a long, cold drive at 5 in the morning alone coming back from annapolis you know. Every song I heard on the radio reminded me of her too. It's like a permanent imprint in my brain of a person that I know I will never completely disassociate with. Like the moon leaving a crater on the face of the earth, her effects are life altering in ways that I never would have comprehended in all my youth. This night I was hoping to spend some time, to hang out, to be friends again. That opportunity did not arise. I know another will probably not come for some time again... and it saddens me greatly despite the suffering I have already put myself through. Where am I going? This ride of life has gotten nauseating. I want someone else to drive for a little while, I am tired of holding on to the oh shit handles. Missing you kat.
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